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January 2007

Ain’t bathrooms classy?

I had a chance to catch Dreamgirls again this past week and the second time around really helped me in formulating an opinion on the film as a whole. It’s got great production value, but director Bill Condon could have done a better job of pulling more nuanced and less affected performances from both Beyonce and Jennifer Hudson. I felt as if Hudson, while having a force-of-nature voice, didn’t quite know what to do with her hands throughout the entire musical. It’s a sign of an immature performer. You can always tell a pro by the way they lay their hands down or keep them from pulling focus away from the scene. Hudson did so much hand-wringing, it was tough to sometimes stay ‘in the moment’ when she was singing.

Aside from the hands, she gave an incredible first-time showing. I’d all but guarantee an Oscar nomination for Hudson, although actually winning it is a whole other bowl of Jello. Let’s just say that it’s a good thing they’re not running her as ‘Best Actress’ against Helen Mirren. The Queen was a tour-de-force performance for Mirren and I’d bet my left testicle that she wins the statue.

Beyonce did well with a role that wasn’t quite as fleshed-out in the stage production, proving she has the vocal chops to get the job done, as well as a hair and makeup team envied by any drag queen worth her salt. The movie sort of beats you over the head about how beautiful she’s supposed to be and by the end of the film you’re just kind of hoping she gets into some disfiguring car accident. With a slew of costume changes, she really comes across as a life-sized, wig-laden Afro-Barbie doll. Yeah, she’s pretty fantastic, but it was obvious from the audience’s reaction that it all seemed a little too Dynasty.

Eddie Murphy was fantastic. I’m so happy that they cut out the ‘Party All The Time’ verse from ‘Cadillac Car’ that Murphy so-desperately wanted left in. Maybe they’ll give him a B-side on the special edition DVD where he can do a duet with some street tranny in WeHo.

I could go for paragraphs on the two versions of Dreamgirls’s signature song ‘And I’m Not Going.’ Both Jenn Holiday and Hudson do it justice in two very different ways. If you’re wanting the psychosomatic breakdown of every single syllable, drop into the All That Chat message center where theatre queens from around the world take their turn being just as cynical and bitchy as New York Times theatre critic Ben Brantley.

This past two weeks of emails into the inbox were mostly regarding who’s hot and who’s not in the wacky world of male escorts. Nipping at the heels of Rentboy’s Hustlaball in Las Vegas (last week), here are some of the names that were mentioned in a slew of emails, both complimentary and otherwise:

Aaron Lawrence

Jason Carter

Adrian Hart

Brett Mathers

Ryan (Phoenix)

Jason Rylee

Scott Adler

Trey Thurston

Aaron Mark

Talvin DeMachio

Eric (NYC)

Jesse Dane

Athan (LA)

Jody (Austin)

Jonathan Lowe (WPB)

Rod Hagen

Josh Weston

Steven Draker

Brock Lachey

Steven Kesslar

Rick Munroe

Vincent Michael

Ben Andrews

Tristan Waters

Bruno Gaucho

I was surprised to hear some of the things mentioned, although luckily most of what was written was complimentary. It seems as if 2006 was a good year for finding great escorts who truly enjoyed providing top-notch service.

Now that we’ve got the list of men widdled down, feel free to email any additional comments you’ve got on these guys and look for next edition of the 15 to break it all down. Look for some super-scandalous blind items from last week’s Hustlaball, as well as two Rascal-exclusive boyfriends getting ready to break into the rentboy trade in a big, big way. You’re not going to want to miss out on this scoop…

This past week was spent enjoying some downtime in Las Vegas. I had decided to sneak into town just after all of the GayAVN hub-bub, cash in my chips at the Wynn and enjoy a few days of watching television in bed while eating like a starved swine. Had dinner twice at the new outpost of Raos at Caesars and damn if it’s not a great reproduction of the Brooklyn original. Get the lemon chicken. You’ll love it.

I literally spent the entire first day in bed. I got up for a yoga class around 3pm and then worked out, but went directly back to my room, turned on FoxNews and vegged. I had my Mariah Carey moment when I called housekeeping and ordered 4 humidifiers for the room (I was drier than Imelda Marcos’s pootie-tang), setting them strategically around the three rooms for maximum moisture contingent. Sounds silly, but I recommend it to anyone who’s not used to the desert climate and wants to keep their skin from looking like Donatella Versace’s.

Caught a showing of Zumanity and saw my friend Vanessa who’s currently MC’ing the show on Friday nights. Original cast emcee Joey Arias is sounding a little stale and rumor has it that the show’s getting shaken up a little in the coming month: New cast members, music, costumes and the works. Looks like Cirque isn’t as happy with Zumanity’s box office reciepts as they usually are with other Vegas strip shows. While they’re not wanting to scrap the show totally, they’re making adjustments immediately.

FYI: Look for the new Cirque-meets-Chriss-Angel magic show to debut at Luxor (in the theatre formerly occupied by Hairspray) in early Summer. My informants tell me that it will have quite a bit of homoeroticism in it, as well as an overall freakshow-esque vibe.

I stopped by Vegas’s newest gay nightstop 8 ½ (and the attached danceclub, Piranha) to see what all the fuss was about. Yes, it’s something new and long-awaited, but there’s just something a bit tacky about the low-ceilings (very trailer park-esque) and the fact that you can’t open a tab with a credit card. Add the fact that any gay bar who charges $5 for a bottle of water is out of their gord and you’ve got the first ‘meta gay bar’ in Vegas who’s taking itself WAY too seriously. I still prefer Gypsy for their ‘come as you are’ attitude and Krave on Koval for their seriously large party space (and true VIP services).

I literally bumped into Britney Spears at Pure in Caesars Palace, apologized for the intrusion and ended up buying her another RedBull (sans alcohol), which her bodyguards watched being poured with hawk-like eyes. She was gracious and said ‘thanks.’ If I was a betting man, I would have assumed she was wearing underwear that night. I didn’t ask.

Breakfasts at The Peppermill are always a great way to start off a day in Vegas… Even if that day begins at 6pm. Get ‘Munch’s Special’ and you won’t be disappointed.

Spent a morning at the spa getting a very high-priced beating with what appeared to be palm fronds, followed up by a deep tissue massage that elicited more grunting from me than spending a night with Eric in NYC. The Wynn spa has a intimate, but comfortable spa for men (clothing optional) that seemed REALLY cruisy the day I was there. No less than 4 guys, all towel-clad and muscular, were on the prowl in the steam room, as well as in the showers. When you’re there for relaxation alone, your eyes don’t tend to dart back and forth like you’re trying to avoid detection. It was obvious, but then again, the spa attendant didn’t seem to mind.

Just as I was getting situated to leave, a really hot red-head was getting undressed at the locker behind me. SHIT. Based on his trailing eyes over my shirtless torso, it seemed we shared more in common than just hair color. He had a nice body, with a perfectly proportionate chest that tapered to well-defined lower abs and a shaggy red bush. Sadly, my fantasy of red-on-red action went unfulfilled. I had to book out of there. SHIT (again).

BN’s drink of the moment: Nutrisoda. This staple drink of the Watermark Hotel has me hooked! It’s pretty much got the caloric intake of pure water, with an added dose of vitamins and all-natural stress-busters. For an even more mellowing effect, I highly recommend chasing it with 10 milligrams of Valium.

Note: Nutrisoda does not currently include a 10-milligram dosage of Valium with every can.

Whackoff of the Week hasn’t been featured for awhile, so let’s jump right back onto that gravy-train and introduce you to BoyCollector. This site features very twinky guys, perfect for you guys who like them legally young and VERY boyish. From what I can tell, there’s no spam on this site and pop-ups aren’t much of a problem. Enjoy!

New images are being added daily to both my Google Galleries, as well as my MySpace site, both of which can be found on the above left-hand menu. I’m formatting some new video as well, which should be posted in the coming couple of days: It’s basically me making a total ass out of myself in Las Vegas… Always good for a laugh.

Since tax-time is just around the corner, I thought I’d link back to an old edition of the 15 that made perfect sense in describing the incredible joy that is the IRS:

This week’s EYE CANDY

As mentioned above, if you’ve got a yea-or-nay on any of the nominated escorts above, shoot The 15 an email and let us know what’s up. We’re always listening…