Merd… Christmas is here, which means there’s a 90% chance that I’ll have to worry about Amazon.com’s ability to deliver on-time, as well as really ramping up the stalking-factor of my UPS man.  You know, the usual:  Being overly friendly with him, feigning interest in the NFL, sharing false communal laugher at lewd comments about attractive local females (thus killing the shred of heterosexuality I may have had left) and offering- well, bribing- him with free concert tickets.  It’s just my way of ensuring I get things on a speedy and expeditious basis.  There’s nothing worse than having to suffer through the never-ending UPS pickup line at one of their base stations.  It’s truly akin to passing a kidney stone, or at least having to watch an entire QVC segment with Marie Osmond and those damned creepy porcelain dolls she sells.

What?  You’ve never seen Marie, her insane face-lift and those dolls?  Exhibit A:

Thankfully, the madness will all be over in a week and 2012 will be here:  A year that will encompass many good changes for me, but overall, I think it’s going to be one amazing year.  After logging nearly 350k miles on airlines this year (not counting private travel), I think I’m going to take the first half of 2012 easy.  No more overnights to London.  No more weekend flings in Singapore.  If there’s one thing I now realize, it’s that no matter how much money you’re being paid, there’s no price you can put on treating your body well.  Abuse, in any form, will come back to haunt you later in life.  At 30, it’s time for me to not only worry about keeping my body in shape, but my mind clear and my goals within reach.  I’d say that sounds like a pretty clear-cut and attainable New Year’s resolution.

Above:  The body is staying put, but the blond hair is going.  It was fun while it lasted.

Just spent a week in Manhattan and ended up joining a new gym, as my visits to the city are becoming frequent enough to warrant it.  I now have four gym memberships.  Is that a sign of insanity or just the overwhelming want to look good naked?  I’m now a member of David Barton Gyms, allowing me access to all of their locations across the States.  If you haven’t seen their website, take a quick look at it.  It’s unique to say the least.  Very design-oriented, yes, but the equipment is top notch and the classes are really creative.  Naturally, it’s THE gay gym in New York City, but thankfully, people seem to really want to stay in shape there and not just cruise the locker room while on Grindr.  I do like the live DJ who spins several times a week there.  The atmosphere is clubby and social, but it’s obvious that people go there to sweat.

My first week at the club gave me an interesting window into the typical New York homosexual’s workout routine.  While my goal is to remain as balanced and proportionate as possible, it appears that many out there don’t share that idea.  In the words of Jerry Seinfeld, what’s the deal with gay men who don’t work out anything past their waist? Are abs and arms really all that someone needs anymore to get laid?  More importantly, is that a healthy way to train your body?  Take it from me, someone who does squats twice a week and could suffocate a strong adult with his butt cheeks:  Guys are sexy when they don’t have stick legs.  Another not-so-secret:  After legs days the testes produce the most testosterone, leading to greater growth in ALL parts of the body.  If you cut off the legs from your workouts, you cut out a whole lot of muscle-building potential.

I didn’t have a chance to see any shows while I was in the city this time, but kept kicking myself after I was back in San Antonio for missing Stephanie Block in Anything Goes.  From the clips on YouTube, it looked like she was an equal (if not better) replacement for a vacationing Sutton Foster.

Got an email from my cellular company the other week letting me know I was eligible for an upgrade.  Already?  It felt like I just bought the HTC Thunderbolt, but who was I to argue if they wanted to knock some cash off a brand new device?  I jumped on it like Piers Morgan on a hacked voicemail.  I ended up getting Google’s new Galaxy Nexus, a 4G LTE phone that, so far, has been eons better than what I was using.  It required no extended battery.  No endless firmware updates. Nothing.  It was great-to-go right out of the box.  In only a little over a week, I’ve laid down hard for this Google phone- So quickly has this device made me its techno-bitch, I now realize why the French bleated like sheep when Hitler rolled into town.

If you’re looking to fight Christmas Day boredom with a stunner of a blu ray disc, I can’t recommend Adele’s Albert Hall concert enough.  She’s in good voice, great personality and her set is simple, leaving the real show (her voice, the songs) to shine through.  In a world where Britney Spears can somehow sell out her world tour with nearly 100% lip-syncing, it’s amazing to watch an artist like Adele show people how it’s really done.  I once feared that our generation would never find its own Judy Garland or Peggy Lee, but rest assured, Adele can easily carry that candle.

 

Starting the day after Christmas, I’ll be wrapped in the quiet confines of Amangiri for a solid week, likely letting some email pile up and only responding to those who have my personal email and/or contact phone number.  I promised myself I would take some of this holiday for myself and I’m actually doing it this time.  I was an inch away from making this a Santa Fe-based Christmas, but Aman made me an offer I couldn’t refuse.  For more info on this stunning resort, you can click through to their website above or read through some of my past experiences there (with many included pictures).

 

Tonight I’ll also be taking the time to answer through a mass of Q&A questions that I’ve let sit for far too long.  I apologize about that.  Up to nearly 400 answered questions about my life and views and I’m shocked that people still find things to ask.  Very shagadelic.  As always, I thank you for taking time out of your day to interact…  Even if it’s just to read and lurk around.

Also, I’ve added new photos to the online BN Archive and continue to photoblog daily.  I’ve also been making an effort to ‘tweet’ more often.  It’s not easy being a smart ass AND attempting to say something meaningful all in 140 characters. How the hell do normal people do it? I’ve now realized that Twitter is for people who’s attention spans have been so decayed by Bravo reality television that they can no longer write full blog posts.  There’s something just a little tragic about that.

Here’s wishing everyone a happy holiday and safe upcoming 2012.  To the small group who I am ridiculously blessed to get to spend time with on a regular basis, I appreciate you more you could ever know.  I am thankful to those who I’ve made real, lifelong connections with.  It’s through those friendships that I have become exactly the young man I’ve wanted to be.

 

 

Be excellent to each other,

 

 

 

BN

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