DRAT. Summer is nearly over and it’s been another year of saying to myself, ‘I’m going to take an entire month off, travel somewhere remote and just tune out.’ Fat chance. I ultimately have no complaints here about keeping incredibly busy, but it’s an ideal train of thought that perhaps someday I’ll slow down enough to enjoy the life I’ve worked hard to create. I do have some time to myself coming up in Manhattan and just had a nice few days in Chicago, but that’s still city life… What I’m really looking for is a trip to an Aman property somewhere in Southeast Asia- Luxe and quiet, but without the annoying hang-up of a staff who spends all of their time ‘making you feel like a VIP.’ That much coddling annoys the living shit out of me. Now, if you’ve ever been to an Aman resort, you know what I mean by the perfect staff. They just seem to know what you want (and how you want it) before you even realize it. Things materialize (and sometimes vanish) without you noticing. Really amazing resort chain.
I spent the last few days at Chicago’s Elysian Hotel: Well-located just off Michigan Avenue, a hop-skip-and-jump away from Sprinkles Cupcakes (very dangerous) and convenient to getting some sun on the beach, this one year old property is quickly topping ‘best of’ travel lists. I’m certain it won’t be long before it takes the title of Best Chicago Hotel from The Peninsula. Elysian’s paint job may have just recently dried, but it’s making waves as having the best service (and suites) in town. Rates start in the $400+ night range. Base rooms are large by Chicago standard (500+ sq ft) and the decor is a beautiful mix of greys, cream, blacks and silver accent- Art deco in feel without the stuffiness of any rococo design. Their spa and fitness facility is totally clad in white marble, giving things a very open, light and clean feeling. The men’s area of the spa is exclusive, so for those who would prefer to not wear swimwear when steaming, in the sauna or whirlpool, it’s perfectly comfortable. Personally, I can’t stand wearing swimwear when I’m simply able to go naked. Much easier (and more fun).
Sadly, no visit to Steamworks this time. I like that scene now and then, but keep my visits infrequent. Under-the-radar is a good thing.
Funny story: While working out in their gym on this visit, I was asked to spot by a guy who was doing dumbbell bench presses. After finishing his set, he chatted with me a bit and I went back to doing my kettlebell sets. I thought he had looked somewhat familiar, but couldn’t put my finger on who he was or where I had seen him before. After my workout, I saw him again in the men’s locker room. I was heading in to get some steam and he was sitting in the whirlpool. And it hit me: He was the Texas-based conservative televangelist Joel Osteen. I laughed to myself, thinking how complicated things could get if someone had snapped a picture of me spotting him in the gym and sold it to the tabs. Fortunately, for both of us, he didn’t seem to be of the homosexual persuasion, kept to himself and was a perfectly congenial gent… Not that I’ll be attending his church services anytime soon.
Continued appreciation goes out to all of you who have submitted questions to my very-popular Q&A feature. I do try to get replies out as soon as I can and so far, I’ve gotten to over 250 questions. The site remains a totally anonymous way for you to ask me anything you’re thinking… Good, bad, indifferent. While I won’t comment on the innermost details of my personal life, I will try to get to just about everything else.
The questions I’m asked over and over again on the Q&A have been 1) why have you not done porn (or would you) and 2) why no XXX shots on your website? Both good queries and ones I’d like to answer here to set the record straight. I’ve had plenty of offers from sites to model, ranging from Sean Cody to Michael Lucas to FratPad and I’ve always, immediately, thanked them, but declined. As an outsider looking in, the industry of porn is an odd duck to me. It’s rare that anyone who actually does gay porn makes their fortune at it. Many of the ‘stars’ (if there is such a thing anymore) I’ve come in contact with seem to live on a paycheck to paycheck basis.
But more than just the money angle, there’s too much addiction running loose in porn as well: Addiction to drugs, money, alcohol, sex, ego. You name it. It’s all there. The lifestyle of excess hits these guys hard and fast. Ever notice how much a once-handsome guy can change in appearance from the time he starts porn to the time he exits? ‘Rode hard and put up wet’ is the term that immediately springs to mind. Many of these guys make little effort in keeping themselves attractive (steroids don’t count) and end up looking like hyper-tanned, lined, hollow-eyed versions of their former selves. More than all of that is the very large contingent of clientele out there who don’t want to watch their would-be escort get nailed by everything and anything that moves on video. While a few might find it attractive, selling yourself at top dollar when you’re really just a piece of meat is a tough draw if you’re looking for more than just the hourly.
In a nutshell, porn isn’t for me. It’s a sucker’s bet. For most who end up doing it, they get off on the ego trip and realize (usually too late) that the studio they’re working for is always looking for the bigger, better deal. Not the kind of life I want to live.
As for my pictures, I think I’ve always straddled the line pretty well. As someone who understands advertising, it’s important to keep people updated on how you look, but not to reveal everything in one gigantic A-bomb. Why in the world would someone want to spend their money on something they already know everything about? There’s no mystery left. No allure. It’s all there on the web, forever, for people to pick apart and jack off to (rather than WITH you). Ultimately, I realize that most guys who get involved with the adult industry aren’t always rocket scientists: Many allow others to make all of their image decisions for them and simply expect to collect a check at the end of the month. That kind of laziness is what leads someone to burn brightly, but also very quickly. To have a real lifespan in this business, you’ve got to have smart people behind you or have the skills to get the job done yourself.
I’ll be spending some of this upcoming week in the Northeast, then heading to Hawaii for a little while, stopping off in LA on the way back home and then Key West to end August. It’s been an incredibly fun, and successful 2011 so far, allowing me to renew old friendships and forge new ones. While every amazing ride has to come to an end eventually, I certainly don’t want this to be my last year in the escort saddle. Between putting in hard work on changing my body for the better and feeling like I’ve finally got the near-perfect circle of guys surrounding me, I’m having to seriously push myself back into the mindset of moving onward and upward in life. I’ve got the education and the contacts… Now all I need is the motivation to do something different with my life.
We shall see. All I can say for sure at this point is to stay tuned. I’m still having entirely too much fun with all of this and over the last few months, I’ve had a renewed vigor for not only the travel, but the sex as well. I chalk it up to finally- truly- being comfortable with it all and playing the game by my own rules. At the very least it should lend itself well to additional sexscapade stories here on 15mm. What’s the use of having a handsome face, muscular body and young guy’s sex drive if you’re not going to use it. That being said, I always play safe, always have and chastise those fellow sex workers who do not. My ideology on that will not ever change. Neither will will penchant for publicly calling people out on it.
And speaking of muscular, here are some of the latest shots from my photoblog on my work-in-progress. My core/abs are lining up nicely and I’m keeping my body fat low, leading to that ripped, very dry look. I continue to eat healthily and gym 5x a week. Three of those days are weights, while the other two are strictly cardio. I’ll also be starting a regime of bikram yoga in the coming weeks, which should make it easier for me to remain lean and vascular, but most importantly flexible. At 6’3”, I’m proud to say that I can quite easily put both of my legs behind my head without much effort… Not that it would come in useful or anything.
Until we meet again, be well readers,
BN